Wow. Where do I even begin? I’ve been here only a week, yet my life is starting to change so much. I was able to skype with my parents for a bit, which was really amazing. I miss them and I hope that I can extend my trip after Africa so they can come and visit (and I can stay here).
Yesterday was our first day of classes, we woke up at 6:15 to help with breakfast crew, my job was to butter make the toast. It was amazing how fast I was able to wake up considering I can’t recall the last time I actually was up willingly at the break of dawn. At 8, we have our first class, which is wildlife ecology. We do a review of what ecology is and some of the key terms we need to know for the semester. Next is Swahili. The class is a little rambunctious, but it’s all in good fun. We go through the Swahili alphabet. They have all the same letters as in English except for Q. Before we know it, it’s time for lunch. We eat the same thing almost every day, but it is amazing non-the less. The Saracha sauce I bought an hour before I left has been a hit here at the camp and am sure that if we do not rationalize properly, it will be gone before we know it. We have an hour break in between and I take a short siesta. Austin, who I will talk more extensively about later, brought a slack line and when I was trying it out, I fell straight on my ass and completely bruised the lower half of my back. I spent the rest of the day (and still) in lower back pain. Our last and final class of the day is Environmental Policy. It is a two-hour class and the teacher’s accent makes it very difficult to understand. By the end of class, I had made a paper football and we were all flicking field goals and getting restless. Lesson of the day: Sit in the front of the classroom for Environmental Policy. We are finished by 4 in the afternoon and decide that we will go to the local market to browse around and do a bit of haggling.
The market is unreal. Instantly we are bombarded with Africans trying to sell us necklaces, bracelets and small figures. I am followed by a man whose name I eventually learn is James. He is persistent and begins to cry in front of me telling me he has no way of getting back to his home. At this point I should have asked him how he was able to get to the market if he didn’t have any money, but my better half felt for him and he suckered me into buying a few bracelets and necklaces for much more than they were worth. I spent 10,000 shillings (roughly 8 dollars) on four necklaces and two bracelets. Allie comes out of nowhere and we spend the rest of the time wandering around the market. We are constantly asked to purchase stuff and after a while we get fed up with it and tell people “Tokah!” which in Swahili means “Go away” or more vainly “Piss off”. Mel was being followed by one person and when she told the man she was too poor to afford anything, she was given a look of disgust and was answered by, “You have no idea what poor is”. Still, everyone here is happy. We head back to our vehicles and a man sees me walking with my water bottle. He tries to bargain with me and trade me a piece of Ebony tree (endangered) for the water bottle. I try to explain to him that we are all environmentalists and that we do not want to have anything that would be damaging to the local ecosystems, he does not understand. He tries and tries and tries, but still I refuse. At 5:30 we make our way back to the Field Station and get ready for dinner.
Dinner’s here are amazing. Every night we have fresh guacamole, an assortment of fruits and vegetables, pasta and rice. Josh, who started the fine dining committee, purchased a sugar cane for dessert and we watched as Arthur, our cook, begin to hack away at the plant. It tastes sweet, but bland. You suck out the juice until there is nothing but fiber remaining and then you spit out the rest. Josh also tells us that he found out how much it would be to purchase a goat and everyone who would like to have fresh goat in the upcoming week needs to give him money. Everyone is interested and we all throw in 2000 shillings ($1.50 each) for a live goat that will be slaughtered and eaten very soon. I am starting the Star Gazing Platform Committee where we will build a platform for us to stargaze on so that we can avoid the risk of being bitten by a snake at night. People seem enthused and the planning will be started later today (kind of wish Zach Kahn were here to help build it).
Everyone is playing banana grams and enjoying life in what I think of is semi-solitude. Eventually we all make our way out to the bonfire and play hot seat. Hot Seat for those of you who do not know is where you are put on the spot and bombarded with question which you have to answer truthfully. Everyone here is non-judgmental and are willing to share anything with the group. Eventually people start to leave, but Austin, Mikayla and I lay down to look up at the night sky. It is the first time in my life that I’ve ever been able to see the Milky Way and it truly is surreal. The discussion soon turns into a philosophic conversation.
I’m going to dive into a bit of what we said. I am brutally honest in these journals and if someone is offended with any of these ideas, I am sorry. Our conversation starts with religion. We all think pretty agnostically, however we all feel that religion is important not for the beliefs, but for the values it teaches and the time it enables you to have to spend with your family. We all believe that the concept of a God watching over us a bit outdated and that people are extremely ignorant when it comes to some religious beliefs. There are so many views of a higher power in this world, yet we cannot prove or disprove any of it. We all agree that in order for society to thrive, we need to break the bonds of an all seeing power and an afterlife. We believe that there is intelligent life out there and that we are far from the most advanced society in the universe. We discuss the benefits of natural selection among the human race and what our purpose in life is. Mikayala begins with how for 10,000 years we have done nothing but destroy the earth and how sad it is. I nod, but add that it is also our gift. It is up to this generation to save the earth and if we can do so our names will be stamped in the history books for the rest of the human race.
In addition, we all believe that there is a multi-verse where laws of physics are completely different than those in our own universe. The universe is the next thing we begin to talk about and the insignificance of our lives. Seriously, I truly believe that when it comes down to it, we are chemistry and that our lives, according to the universe, serve no purpose whatsoever. It is a bit depressing to think about, but at the same time, it makes our life so much more beautiful. We came from stardust and we will one day return to the stars to form new planets and potentially new life. Think about it. Every atom in your body has come from somewhere. In all likelihood, the atoms that we have are the same atoms that were in living dinosaurs, volcanic ash and supernovas. It is a bit mind-blowing to think about since we all are looking at the star lit night sky.
Our discussion dives deeper into death. Austin makes a point that I find to be very very true. He uses the anecdote about college and how he was scared of going to college, but all of his friends have done it and have done it successfully, so why is there a reason to be scared. The same goes for death. Everything living thing on this planet dies. That is a fact. It didn’t hurt before we were born, so why should it hurt after? There is no immortality on this earth. The beauty of our life is that it is limited. We all study processes that happened far in the past and dive deep into the future, which infuriates us all because we all want to know what happens. I add that I wish I could be alive for one day every million years just to see where life has evolved, how plate tectonics have shaped the world and what our species (if it is still around) will be like. We all say now that we want to live forever, but at the same time, there is so much we have not yet lived and by the time we are no longer the youngest generation in our family, our thoughts will in all likelihood change.
The last, and probably the most important thing we begin to talk about is happiness. At school, I am constantly convinced that the things I have make me happy, but I am so wrong. I am probably happier here than I have been at school. I am as happy as I was on EIE and interestingly, it is when I remove myself from the material world that this happens. Why is this? Is happiness internal rather than external? No. It is a balance of both. Happiness comes only through living things. Thing that can feel happiness that way we can. That is where happiness comes from. Happiness to me is not about how nice my clothes are, how expensive my car is or my check book. It is far from it. When I spend my time trying to focus on those things and searching from happiness with inanimate objects, I constantly find myself depressed. When I remove myself from that life and seek happiness in others, I am ecstatic and at peace. I am anxious about this thought since I am afraid that I will fall back into the other category when I return to the states, but hopefully this understand will help me to avoid the mistakes I have made for quite some time. It is now 12:30 in the morning and we have been talking for two and half hours. I don’t think there are many people at school that I could have this conversation with and it saddens me that I can’t. Or can I? Maybe it’s me who hasn’t made the effort at school to be as happy as I can be. Maybe everyone at school is looking for these conversations, but cannot find the right person to talk to these things about. I am amazed at how close I have become with all these people in such a short amount of time. In less than a week, I know more about these people than some of my closest friends at school. Maybe it’s the fact that I know I won’t be judged here the way I would be back in the states or maybe it’s the underlying idea that we all think alike and have very similar interests. Whatever it is, there is magic in the air. Don’t get me wrong. I love my friends at home and I would do anything for them, but I wish that I could have more conversations like the one I had with Austin and Mikayla. I wish we could talk more about these abstract ideas than where we are going for the night. The night before I left for school, I was chilling with Levy, Vila, Cummings, Levin, Shore and a few others. We had a great conversation and I hope that these conversations will only intensify when I return to the states and the people I don’t have the conversations with will be more willing to share their thoughts with me. My grandparents have taught me that knowledge and wisdom do not come through speaking; they come through listening. I want to listen to each of your ideas about these topics I have begun to discuss. I want to know what makes you happy and what happiness means to you. I want to know about your views on religion, materialism, meaning of life and where in the hell we come from. I want to know it all and the beauty behind it is that I don’t have an eternity to learn it all, I have a lifetime.
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